It’s been several years since I last dipped my toes in the dating pool and things sure feel different now. In the past I was young and carefree and wore my heart on my sleeve. After finding love, thinking it was forever but having it end in heartbreak, has changed me and made me a little more cautious. Having met a lot of new people this year and discovering more about myself I have realised this cautiousness is completely normal but that it shouldn’t stop me from diving in again and seeing what is out there.
But here’s where the problem comes in… The dating game has changed with the advent of technology – Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Tinder. It is easy to “fall” for their online personality without really knowing much about him/her. You can of course also stalk a potential new interest quite easily but this skews the perception of this person and it takes all the fun out of discovering things as the relationship progresses. Now you add Tinder to the mix because you aren’t meeting anyone special through your friendship circles because you know all their friends who are married, in serious relationships, or not your type, or because you aren’t meeting anyone interesting when going out with the handful of your friends that are single. And with Tinder being only about what you look like you then need to sift between the guys that are only after one thing and those that are actually genuine about wanting to find someone special, which I suppose makes things a little easier and quicker depending on what you’re after of course.
I remember when things seemed simpler… When you would spend hours chatting and messaging (and racking up the phone bill). When you would jump in to something new without worrying about whether it would end or whether you’d be heartbroken. When I had a good grasp of guessing the person’s age and trusted my intuition. When life didn’t seem so complicated because of me over-thinking my every move.
I’ve promised myself to be a little more crazy, to letting things happen and run their course, to jumping in and showing the dating game what I’ve got.